Stop Hiding Your 'Too Much-ness'

Many of us were raised by families in which we were repeatedly told that we were “too much”.

‘Too loud’, ‘too happy’, ‘too excitable’, ‘too intense’, 'too sensitive', ‘too emotional’ – some of us were even told that we were ‘too powerful’.

It’s a painful experience when our essential self is not wanted, but what happens energetically when we believe this story? We shrink ourselves down to a version of what others want us to be.

We become energetically small, invisible, and eventually, we take our energy elsewhere. In the meantime, our bodies might get bigger and we may struggle with our weight.

Often we take our energy so far elsewhere that we stop bringing our life force in at all, and then we become physically sick. We may even come close to death.

If we don’t die, the result is often depression because we don’t feel that our authentic self is welcome.

We lose our capacity to be present, which accelerates disease and illness.

Ironically, no-one is happy we aren’t fully in the room, even if they act like they want us to play small. Everyone subconsciously knows we aren't present, and it doesn't feel good to ANYONE, even to the people who fear the power of our presence, for us to not be fully there.

So we create unhealthy relationship dynamics to avoid being present, and settle for unsatisfying exchanges based on a mask which hides everything - including all that is unique and amazing about us. We shrink our energy, make ourselves invisible, create dis-ease and manifest illness in our bodies.

Once a trauma pattern is part of our physical form - stuck in our cells - we have to work with ALL our energy bodies - i.e., our physical, emotional, mental, and energetic/auric bodies, It's not a question of "energy first", because the whole body-mind-spiritual system has to be treated holistically and not separated out into discrete parts.

The only question is, whether to work 'top-down' (addressing thoughts), or bottom up (addressing physiology)?

It's easier to allow changes to filter up (bottom up) through all the layers of consciousness than work from the top down. There is increasingly more resistance as we move top down. So we start from the bottom, transforming the densest layer of consciousness first. Once your physical body is on-board with the new process, permanent change happens almost effortlessly throughout all the layers of consciousness, because there is less resistance going bottom up.

So, if the trauma is stuck in our cells, and is being held by our nervous system, it makes better sense to work with the physical body first, because it is denser than the mental, emotional, and energy bodies.  

Compared with the physical body, the less dense emotional, mental and auric bodies are easy to change. When dis-ease and distress is already manifest in the physical body, this is the most difficult - and most important - level to start with.

Taking time to understand how your nervous system works, and work with it, not against it, will help you learn how to embody wholesome and pleasurable experiences for long lasting change. You also find a way to meet, process, and integrate experiences held in the body that perpetuate the emotions, thoughts, beliefs and behaviours that have been keeping you stuck, and stopping you from sharing your gifts with the world.